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This story was inspired by the "Every Single Time" fic-a-thon on [ profile] dwpronathon. Basically what happens when some rather grown up but decidedly immature people decide to see how much smut you can fit into a single episode of Doctor Who. In this case 'Rose"'.
(Honestly it's all [ profile] jer832's fault!! Just sayin')

Authors: [ profile] jer832 and [ profile] fogsblue, manips by [ profile] scifiangel
Summary: Rose. With smut. Yep, that's it.
Rating: Adult.
Notes: Complete crack. Or a farce. Basically. Not to be taken seriously.

I.  I'll be your dream I'll be your wish I'll be your fantasy [Savage Garden]

"I'm the Doctor, by the way. What's your name?"


"Nice to meet you, Rose.  Run for your life."

Henricks' fire door closed with a solid thud, leaving Rose on the outside as the Doctor went back in to blow up nightmare monsters, her job and (if what he'd told her was to be believed) maybe himself as well.   Rose knew she should get away from the building, but she just couldn't leave…Her heart was pounding, blood thundered throughout her body, and a tight hot coil of hunger deep and low in her center shuddered and swelled against the boundaries of common sense.  She looked at the plastic arm that the most fascinating and enigmatic bloke she'd ever met (not to mention the hottest) had yanked off a killer store dummy and given her—her souvenir of the best bloody time she had ever had.  She forced the fire door open and ran back inside.


The Doctor had to destroy the Nestene's relay on the roof, stop the drones, and overload the Nestene Consciousness's neurons sufficiently for it to conclude that the inhabitants of Earth were not amenable to being conquered. Being very clever, he'd set the explosive device so that it would be completely failsafe--which meant it would blow up the entire building. Quite possibly it would blow him up along with it, as he had told the girl. But quite possibly not, and the Doctor was in a mood to toss a coin. Whistling a lighthearted little Gallifreyan tune as he calculated the timing for a long-legged not overly cautious lope to the exit, he knelt to set the explosive.

"What made the dummies start on a rampage?" Rose's voice asked over the Doctor's shoulder, a heated breeze against his left ear. He jumped, and the primed explosive crashed to the concrete floor.

Rose stared in fascination at the colourful Christmas lights blinking all across the gizmo.

The Doctor stared in horror as the device's warning lights blinked a countdown to detonation… 20 ->19->18->17->

The Doctor snatched up the device.  "Jeopardy friendly is what you are, Rose," he whinged as he hurried to disarm it with his sonic screwdriver.

"Is that bad?"

Rose grinned at him, her tongue tip peeking out from the corner of her mouth. It was something a child would do.  It was also something a woman very much aware of life and … things … might do.  Stopping himself from licking his lips, he gave Rose a condescending look.  "Yup. When you're with me."

"Is it ever good?" she asked.

The Doctor looked Rose up and down, taking the scenic route. When his eyes met hers, Rose blinked but didn't look away. Behind Rose Tyler's eyes he saw a gravity well of black desire the equal of his. And an endless universe of space and time and dangerous adventure.

"When you are with me," the Doctor drawled in a voice as dark and sultry as the look he gave her now. 

Then the Doctor was sliding Rose's denims down, and Rose got a leg free and a hand on his hip for leverage and sprang up off the floor, knowing that he would catch her. Rose was wet and ready, and wanting the Doctor so hungrily that she was trembling with it.  The Doctor was already hard and hot, freed from his denims and as ready for Rose as Rose was for him. He caught her by the hips, brought her up and rammed her down onto him, impaling her so deeply, so fiercely, that Rose grunted and grabbed at the wall for support. As she wrapped her legs around him, one of the Doctor's hands slipped between their bodies and found her clit. Rose pulled the Doctor’s face close and captured his soft lips with her teeth. His mouth opened to the gift of Rose's adeptly probing tongue, and then he took her mouth on his own terms, driving his tongue into its sweet recesses as he drove himself into Rose's center.  Rose could barely breathe but neither one of them seemed to care. Steadying herself with the palm of one hand against the wall, Rose rode the Doctor as he pounded into her. 

They came fast and hard and not particularly quietly.


"Follow my instructions this time, Rose Tyler.  Leave. Run. Don't look back." Opening the door, the Doctor slapped Rose's bum and pushed her outside. "Now off with you, and don't you think of coming for me again, hear?"

"Can you blow it on remote?" Rose asked, then blushed.

When Rose Tyler was embarrassed she was gorgeous.  And hot.  And almost irresistible.  The Doctor grinned. "If you're really talented and lucky, you should get the same result." Then he smiled at Rose darkly. "But it's not nearly as satisfying."

"Don't forget to leave," Rose warned, carefully ignoring both the Doctor's smirk and the coil of heat tightening within her again.

Rose raced out of Henricks then skidded to a stop and waited for the explosion.  The deactivated Auton arm was still in her hands, clutched tightly against her body.

With a small smile, Rose imagined the Auton hand was the Doctor's hand, his long fingers teasing and tormenting one of her nipples while his other hand made love to her clit.  His mouth would be around her other nipple, and Rose moaned with her fantasy and her memory of him biting, lathing it roughly, sucking her into excruciating pleasure. Her fingers played with the waistband of her denims, teasing her skin, finding their way inside.

"He'll kiss me, all across my face with those little tickling nibbles and his soft cool lips, and then he'll lick at my throat teasin'-like, and look up with that grin. But then his eyes will burn hot like they do.  I need you Rose Tyler, he'll say, and then he'll drive himself into me again and again, hard and good, oooh Doctor so good so… " Rose closed her eyes around her fantasy, pushing herself closer and closer to release. "Don't ever leave me Rose Tyler, he'll say, I need you; Rose I love you."  

Rose's breath caught, she reached back, found a wall and held on, and forced her body to appear composed as shock waves destroyed the restless serenity within. "Don't leave me, Doctor," she whispered, "I love you."



  I wanna hold your hand [Lennon & McCartney]

Rose arrived home to find her mum Jackie in a complete state, seeming to be half convinced she’d gotten blown up. After her mother calmed down a bit, Jackie started talking to all her friends. Soon after, Mickey arrived. While Rose liked him, she admitted to herself she really needed to find a way to end things with him, and not just because of the great shag she’d had with the Doctor. 

The following morning Rose’s alarm woke her up, followed quickly by the voice of her mum shouting that there was no point in her getting up, she didn’t have a job now. As far as Rose could tell she was also rambling on about compensation and something else. Figuring her mum was at least partially right, she decided she’d stay in her pyjamas for now.

Rose was rather bored by the time she heard something rattling around the cat flap. After yelling at her mum she went to check it out, admittedly bloody shocked when she saw the blue eyes of the Doctor staring back at her through the cat flap.

Well, this should be interesting. Rose stood up in a hurry, pulling up the waistband of her sagging pyjama bottoms and smoothing back her morning hair, and opened the door.

A not completely surprised Doctor demanded, “What you doing ‘ere?”

“I live here,” Rose replied, in the sort of tone that said ‘that’s obvious’.

“Well, what’d you do that for?” The Doctor asked.

“Because I do!” Rose shouted. “And I'm only at home because someone blew up my job.”

The Doctor looked confused. “Must've got the wrong signal. You're not plastic, are you?”

Rose raised her eyebrows at that and the Doctor just knew she was about to say something about him shagging plastic so he hurried on. “No, bonehead. Bye, then!”

Before the Doctor could run off, Rose grabbed him and dragged him into the flat. “You, inside. Right now.”

Jackie asked Rose who had arrived at the flat.  She said it was about the inquiry, but she didn't do a very good job of heading her mum off, though; while she was off getting the Doctor coffee, she heard her mum hitting on him.  

Rose wasn’t sure whether to be disgusted or amused by the fact her mother was hitting on the same bloke she’d suddenly shagged last night; but she was definitely relieved when her mum stuck her head into the kitchen to say she was heading over to Bev’s. Jackie told her to make sure the ‘rude git’ was done and out of there by the time she got back.  Rose grinned—her plan exactly! She'd already decided on the denim skirt that flared out a little at the bottom. It wasn't as flattering as the pencil skirt but a lot easier to move in.  And the deep-cut top with the translucent fill-in panel. Or, maybe the jersey wrap dress that nicely accentuated her...


While he was keeping himself amused while waiting patiently (sort of) the Doctor heard something scuttling around the living room, and was Rose really still nattering on with that Venus flytrap in pink?

“You got a cat?” The Doctor called out, hoping it would interrupt.

“No,” Rose replied. “We did have, but there’s these...”

The Doctor stopped hearing everything as the arm he’d pulled off a dummy last night launched itself at him, grabbed him around the neck and tried to choke him.

Rose walked into the living room carrying the coffee and still talking. She glanced over at the Doctor being choked by the plastic arm, shrugged, and said. “Thought I tol’ Mickey to throw tha’ out.”

The Doctor (if Rose had actually noticed) almost rolled his eyes at the statement, not quite able to believe she thought he was playing around. He finally managed to get the hand off from around his throat and threw it away, but the arm launched itself at Rose.  He jumped up from the chair with a shout and was after it.

As they both tried to wrestle the arm from Rose’s face they crashed through Jackie's coffee table, landing on the floor in a heap and rolling over each other, a mixed-up twisting jumble of legs and arms (one too many), exposed breasts (just the right number), and other assorted body parts, soft and warm, hard and, well, harder, until finally they got the arm away from Rose’s face and the Doctor found a setting on his sonic screwdriver to turn it off.

By then, however, the plastic arm was the only thing turned off.  Rose, from her convenient position on top of the Doctor could tell he was rather turned on and whether he could tell or not, she was rapidly heading that way herself.

Not one to let even something like a rampaging erection stop him when his mouth and the impressive Time Lord pun and double-entendre center of his cerebral cortex was controlling his brain, he waved the arm at Rose and added, “There ya go, see, 'armless.”

Rose rolled her eyes.  “It might be ‘armless’, but you’re certainly not. So, your sonic thingy has a setting for wayward plastic bits.  Are there settings for any other wayward bits?" She reached down between them to run her hand over his groin. 

The Doctor's wayward but obviously impressive bit took that moment to comment.  With a gasp, Rose reflexively ground against him, and he groaned, his fingers reflexively digging into her buttocks.

"I'd better… Mum might…  You're coffee's getting cold." Rose stammered as she rolled off the Doctor and crawled to the sofa.  Clutching at her waistband, she tried subtly to pull her jammy bottoms up, but she was kneeling on the most of them.  She felt the Doctor's hot breath on the back of her neck. 

"Need help?"  he asked softly, his fingers playing with her waistband.


And his hands were slowly sliding the material down her thighs, which had somehow come apart; and she was leaning forward, gripping the sofa cushion, breathing fast and seeing stars and smelling him as his jacket covered her and his hands held her hips motionless as his erection pushed up into her. Rose was so turned on and so ready that when he slowly slid out and pushed in again, moving one hand up to caress her cheek and turn her face to him for a soft lingering kiss, and slipping his other hand inside her jammies to firmly stroke and circle her clit, the stars exploded and Rose exploded. 


III.  With a word she can get what she came for and she's buying a stairway to heaven [Led Zeppelin]

Before the Doctor could get out of sight, out of her building, and out of her life forever, Rose rushed her front door open and ran after him, almost running into him at the top of the stairs. He was grimacing down at the fresh puddles of puke and something he didn't want to try to identify. 

Seeing what the Doctor was looking at, Rose said "that's why we take the bannisters." 

"And you know what's not on the banister?" He exhaled noisily. "I know it's supposed to be ladies first on your planet, but I'll go down first and catch you." 

"Always the gentleman?" she grinned 

"When the occasion calls for it." He slid down and waited for her just at the bottom.  She gave him a wave and wink and pushed off, fairly flying down to him. 

The Doctor had been half hard again, even after that fantastic shag.  Rose just did… something.. to him that got him hard and hungry, and scared him more than the Master ever had. He didn't want to think about that, though. He did some fast calculations, vectors, acceleration, and the like, then, opening his fly and freeing himself he waited at the bottom for Rose to land in his arms and around his erection.

She made a perfect landing (of course, genius he), groaning as she slid onto him with an ease that suggested he wasn’t the only one still extremely turned on after their previous shag.  A series of quick breathless groans for him were followed immediately by a long loud scream of "Doctor….!" as climax hit her. He was still hard, and as he slid out of her they both moaned.

"Don't say it," Rose warned. The Doctor put on his best innocent Time Lord look and kissed the top of Rose's head.

"I mean it, if you say anything about ladies first, I will slap you."


IV.  Your head is humming and it won't go,in case you don't know the piper's calling you to join him [Led Zeppelin]

"They want to overthrow the human race and destroy you.  Do you believe me?"


"But you're still listening."

Rose stopped and fixed the Doctor with a look. "Really, though Doctor—" she persisted.

Obviously trying to scare her silly with the truth about Nestene thought control wasn't getting Rose Tyler off his back. And that thought only led the Doctor to picture Rose Tyler getting off other parts of him… in vivid, sound and smell and taste-enhanced images. It shattered the Doctor's own thought control and made him hard again.

"—tell me: who are you?"

Who was he?  The knowing outsider, the ancient alien that couldn't get enough of Rose Tyler, human, and would never be able to get enough of her if he didn't stop it—now!

... give or take a few minutes.   He'd take her just once more… walk her back against a convenient nearby—




He nudged the time around Rose Tyler just out of phase with the rest of London's spacio-temporal factuality and forced the two time currents to rush parallel and contrary, like flood-frenzied rivers racing in wild, fierce opposition. He kept the TARDIS bracketed between. Where they skimmed past each other, an opaque curtain of barrier energy grew between the brackets.  He stepped through a bracket, becoming effectively invisible in the present, and took the TARDIS back a few hundred years. 

The Time Lord paid no attention to all that We can't cross our own timeline garbage he always gave his companions to keep them from playing Double Dutch with the time lines. Still, he was careful to muck about only with what was absolutely necessary for him to change in the time line; he didn't want to chance accidentally mucking up his last time with Rose instead of creating the opportunity to screw her with it.

After doing what he had to, the Doctor returned and reset the currents of time in local space, and waited for Rose to come into temporal phase.   If she'd seen him waver, she'd just put it down to her blinking.  No one the wiser; no harm done.  And one ancient sturdy tree for m'lady's bum. 

"Do you know, like we were saying?" he said softly. "About the Earth revolving…." 

He walked back to Rose Tyler.  It was all he could do not to push her up against the new ancient tree that was now directly behind her and take her hard and fast.

"I can feel it—the turn of the Earth." He gripped her hand, lacing his fingers through hers.  "The ground beneath our feet is spinning at a thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour—and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me… clinging to the skin of this …tiny… little world!  And if we let go—" 

The Doctor dropped Rose Tyler's hand with incontestable finality and looked down at her, his eyes infinitely sad, a man wanting nothing more than to be forgiven for still being alive and then forgotten…but needing so badly not to beStanislavski Method. Stan still owed him for that.

"That's who I am," he said soberly. "Now, forget me, Rose Tyler."  He picked up the deactivated Auton arm and waved it in front of Rose's face for emphasis. "Go home." 

Turning his back on Rose Tyler to walk away, the Doctor finally let the smirk come out. 

Seconds later, she wiped it off his face. 

"Forget you, mate! Like that's gonna ever happen."

Rose's honeyed voice, throaty and challenging, her tongue peaking knowingly, sent a wave of chills through the Doctor's body. The short hairs on the insides of his thighs reared up.  And then something else.

As the Doctor turned back to her, Rose's eyes feasted on the denim bulge, evidence of his impressive and likely uncomfortable hard-on. "What's it gonna be, Doctor?" she asked, fingering the buttons of his fly.  "Save the world or loosen you?"

Rose Tyler's body was suddenly up against the new centuries-old tree, held in place by his, one hand wrapped in her hair, the other under her skirt, fingers twisting her thong out of the way.

The Doctor sank his teeth into the pliable muscle of Rose's shoulder and two fingers between her swollen folds.  He started to add a third finger to ready her.  But Rose was more than ready for him. He could read it in her burning amber eyes.  Hear it in the little sweet animal sounds she made. Feel it in the way her silky little hand grabbed his pulsing erection, and in how she effortlessly slid onto the swollen head with the most fantastic friction and the most fantastic little smile. 

Lifting her, the Doctor hooked Rose's legs over his pelvis and pushed up and into her with a long, aching groan.  Rose shifted… against the tree, around his torso, in his arms, and took him deeper; sheathed in her he was consumed by Rose's heat and passion, the dizzying spin of the Earth beneath him, and something he told himself was nothing more than his body's physio-chemical response to being in hers. 


[Part 2]

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